This One is for You, Big Nanny
Bo's grandmother passed away last evening from ovarian cancer. She was originally diagnosed with ovarian cancer back in 2000 when Bo and I were living in Florida, and she had surgery at that time. I remember thinking that she probably wouldn't be around for long because ovarian cancer has such a high mortality rate. Also, she had been in poor health with a weak heart ever since I had been a part of the family. Nonetheless, it was never mentioned again and she was fine until several months ago. Then they discovered the cancer was back and that it was pretty widespread. About the only thing that could be done this time was palliative care.
She went into the hospital last Wednesday, and we visited her on Friday and again on Sunday. On Sunday, we were allowed to bring the boys in to see her, and she was alert enough to interact with them. Bo and I also visited her yesterday afternoon. I knew the end was near, but I didn't know as we left that I had kissed her and said "I love you" for the last time. As Bo and I were waiting by the bank of elevators on the third floor to go back downstairs, we could observe the nursery and see all of the activity around the little newborn babies. We were both thinking about the circle of life. Big Nanny was 83 years old and had a full life. That doesn't make it any easier to say "goodbye", but it is comforting to know she lived a good life and that she is no longer suffering.
She was never called, just "Nanny". We always called her "Big Nanny." The reason escapes me because she couldn't have been five feet tall, and she probably wasn't more than 120 pounds soaking wet. Bo thinks the nickname started as a joke. While her physical stature wasn't big, her presence was. Her health may have been weak, but her will was strong, and she was the family matriarch.
She wasn't the real touchy-feely type of grandmother who smothered you with hugs and kisses, but you always felt loved. She often showed her love with food. Almost every time we went to visit, we left with a sweet potato pie (Bo's favorite since boyhood) or some other type of homemade treat. She was known for her butter beans. She used a pressure cooker and a little bit of margarine (pronounced margareen), but her secret was to add a little bit of sugar when cooking vegetables. Her mama taught her that. Every year, she insisted on having family holidays at her house, and we didn't mind. She would put out quite the spread for us. Several years ago, we all thought it would be easier on her to have it somewhere else, and she reluctantly agreed. I volunteered our house. She still cooked just about everything she normally did and brought it over to our house. She then commandeered my kitchen, and showed me the right way to make mashed potatos and whatever else I was preparing. Anyone else, and I may have been a little put out. Nanny and I got along just fine though. Bo thinks it is because we were so much alike and appreciated eachother's strengths.
Even though the past couple of months were very hard on her, she was always thinking about us. She remembered Lance's and Clay's birthdays and sent cards with the usual $10.00 enclosed to buy a toy. She was very concerned about me and was always asking how I was doing. She lived a life of service and generosity, and of compassion and concern to others up until the very end.
Bo's father told him that last evening, Big Nanny's breathing had became quite labored. She took two deep breaths and then she held up her hand and it looked like she waved. That was the end. I would like to think she was waving goodbye. It would be just like Nanny to depart this world with that last little bit of gumption.
Bo is holding up well. He met his Dad and his grandfather at the funeral home this morning to begin making arrangements. Big Nanny and Papa have been married 63 years. It would have been 64 on Halloween of this year, so I cannot begin to imagine what Papa must be feeling. He is a wonderful, kind man. He has spent so many years caring for Big Nanny that he probably won't know what to do with himself. Cole said last night, "We should all take turns going to sleep with Papa so he won't be alone."
Please keep the family in your thoughts and prayers, especially Bo's grandfather and father. Thelma Gibson's spirit will live on through us in the many ways she touched our lives. We love you, Big Nanny!!
She went into the hospital last Wednesday, and we visited her on Friday and again on Sunday. On Sunday, we were allowed to bring the boys in to see her, and she was alert enough to interact with them. Bo and I also visited her yesterday afternoon. I knew the end was near, but I didn't know as we left that I had kissed her and said "I love you" for the last time. As Bo and I were waiting by the bank of elevators on the third floor to go back downstairs, we could observe the nursery and see all of the activity around the little newborn babies. We were both thinking about the circle of life. Big Nanny was 83 years old and had a full life. That doesn't make it any easier to say "goodbye", but it is comforting to know she lived a good life and that she is no longer suffering.
She was never called, just "Nanny". We always called her "Big Nanny." The reason escapes me because she couldn't have been five feet tall, and she probably wasn't more than 120 pounds soaking wet. Bo thinks the nickname started as a joke. While her physical stature wasn't big, her presence was. Her health may have been weak, but her will was strong, and she was the family matriarch.
She wasn't the real touchy-feely type of grandmother who smothered you with hugs and kisses, but you always felt loved. She often showed her love with food. Almost every time we went to visit, we left with a sweet potato pie (Bo's favorite since boyhood) or some other type of homemade treat. She was known for her butter beans. She used a pressure cooker and a little bit of margarine (pronounced margareen), but her secret was to add a little bit of sugar when cooking vegetables. Her mama taught her that. Every year, she insisted on having family holidays at her house, and we didn't mind. She would put out quite the spread for us. Several years ago, we all thought it would be easier on her to have it somewhere else, and she reluctantly agreed. I volunteered our house. She still cooked just about everything she normally did and brought it over to our house. She then commandeered my kitchen, and showed me the right way to make mashed potatos and whatever else I was preparing. Anyone else, and I may have been a little put out. Nanny and I got along just fine though. Bo thinks it is because we were so much alike and appreciated eachother's strengths.
Even though the past couple of months were very hard on her, she was always thinking about us. She remembered Lance's and Clay's birthdays and sent cards with the usual $10.00 enclosed to buy a toy. She was very concerned about me and was always asking how I was doing. She lived a life of service and generosity, and of compassion and concern to others up until the very end.
Bo's father told him that last evening, Big Nanny's breathing had became quite labored. She took two deep breaths and then she held up her hand and it looked like she waved. That was the end. I would like to think she was waving goodbye. It would be just like Nanny to depart this world with that last little bit of gumption.
Bo is holding up well. He met his Dad and his grandfather at the funeral home this morning to begin making arrangements. Big Nanny and Papa have been married 63 years. It would have been 64 on Halloween of this year, so I cannot begin to imagine what Papa must be feeling. He is a wonderful, kind man. He has spent so many years caring for Big Nanny that he probably won't know what to do with himself. Cole said last night, "We should all take turns going to sleep with Papa so he won't be alone."
Please keep the family in your thoughts and prayers, especially Bo's grandfather and father. Thelma Gibson's spirit will live on through us in the many ways she touched our lives. We love you, Big Nanny!!
posted by Mary @ 8:14 AM
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